Nurturing a Better Dog, Trick No. 2: Attention!

Attention, All Dog Caregivers!

Dogs, just like people, crave attention. It's one of the least obvious but most powerful rewards for encouraging the kind of behaviour you want to see again and again. Ignore a child and eventually he or she will start exploring ways to get some attention from you, and if that means being naughty just to get a reaction from you, that is what he or she will continue to do. We see so many kids who have learned bad behaviour just because it got them some kind of attention. These kinds of children likewise don't get enough attention when they're being good. Yet we blame them and punish them more and more (giving yet more attention!) as they keep repeating the behaviour that we have unwittingly encouraged. And so often we do exactly the same—or worse—with our dogs.

There are many rewards we can use to encourage certain behaviours in dogs, from treats to belly rubs, praise to excited chatter, walks to playtime. But it's that oft-overlooked reward of attention that brings out most behaviours simply because we give it without even thinking—and that's why it's a leading cause of dog problems; we're not being careful about what we give most attention to.

Here's a great dog-behaviour trick: give your dog attention whenever he or she shows a behaviour you want to see more of and ignore (or briefly correct) those which you don't. Pretty simple, huh? And pretty much common sense too. And yet we so often forget to put this into practice.

Be Very Careful What You Give Attention to and What You Ignore

Here's a typical example, one I encounter so often when helping people rehabilitate their dogs: A dog keeps jumping up on guests when they walk in the door, so I ask the person how he or she responds to that, and the reply is that they will shout at the dog, continuously push the dog down, repeat a command to the dog, or walk the dog into another room and close the door. I then ask what they do when the guest is now in the house and the dog has calmed down, and most often the response is that they whisper to their guest to please ignore the dog while he or she is being quiet so as not to evoke more excited behaviour. They have been doing the complete opposite of what they should do to encourage the dog to be calm when visitors come!

Turning Fear into Confidence

Another important example of how to use attention, which may seem difficult to comprehend and much more difficult to put into practice, but which has an instant, profound effect, is when dealing with fearful dogs: A dog may be terrified, for example, of other people when out walking; whenever someone nears or even approaches from afar, the dog starts to back away, pull at the leash, panic, thrash, and do all he or she can to avoid that man or woman. Often, the person on the other end of the leash then starts to talk calmly to the dog, trying to reassure or reason with him or her, speaking in soft, reassuring tones, repeating "It's OK. It's OK." again and again. Yet while the dog is walking happily beside them, they do and say nothing. Without realizing it, they have been encouraging the fearful behaviour while failing to encourage calmness. Yes, that's really all it is!

When I work with these dogs, I ask the person to not do or say (and try not to think about) anything while I calmly and confidently—and literally—take the lead. The dog always freaks out having me so close at first, yet I do nothing more than focus on the walk ahead and give a gentle tug on the leash to get the dog moving forward (a tug involves a quick but gentle pull and immediate release; we don't keep pulling on the leash, as this just maintains tension and invites resistance). While the dog is acting fearful, I ignore as much as possible and maintain a calm, assertive air—in fact, I act aloof, regal, like a leader who expects others to follow. As if by magic, the dog, craving a strong, fair leader to lead him or her through the terrifying ordeal, will choose to come and walk by my side, much to the disbelief of the person, who has never seen their dog choose to approach a stranger before. It gets even better:

Demonstrate Calm Assertiveness

We then walk, with me saying nice, soothing things to the dog while he or she behaves more and more like a happy, confident dog, but still focusing on the good walk ahead. I give a gentle tug without looking whenever the dog starts to think about pulling away, but never look at them, because that's not only attention, but also another invitation to challenge your leadership. When people approach, I anticipate the dog's behaviour and give a gentle tug upwards and towards me together with a firm 'Ah!' or 'Eh!' sound, which, to every dog, means 'Stop it' (those of you who speak Chinese, use the fourth tone; to everyone else, imagine stamping your foot as you say it, which will help you get he correct, short, sharp, deep, falling tone—other tones sound weak to a dog). I sometimes have to put my foot behind the dog to prevent him or her backing away, and may then put the dog in a sit position while the stranger walks past. Any behaviour that is a step towards calm acceptance is rewarded with kind words or a stroke; any time the dog's fear tries to take over, a gentle tug and a serious 'Ah!' or 'Eh!' is used. By doing this just a few times, the dog will start to accept people walking close by, and most often I can have the dog approaching people by his or her own accord simply by sitting down and ignoring the little guy or gal while he or she explores her new-found confidence.

How can we get such an incredible result so rapidly? We simply gave attention (with long, higher-pitched chatter) to the desired behaviour but ignored as much as possible, or gave abrupt, gentle corrections, with short, deep, serious grunts to those behaviours we wanted to stop. Dogs accept new leadership instantly, and they respond incredibly well to attention, and this is how we can achieve this life-changing, seemingly miraculous change in behaviour so quickly. It's a sad realization for the person that their kindness at the wrong times was actually causing fear and unhappiness in their dog. And it's not easy to change; I realize that. But if you want to help your dog, you must overcome your own need to show attention and affection when your dog is going through uncertainty and fear.

Apply the Magic of Attention to Anything!

This same technique works great for preventing all manner of bad behaviours, and can be adapted for all situations. For the dog jumping up on visitors, for instance, calm, gentle, lengthy attention should be given to the dog when he or she is quiet, and the jumping up should be deterred simply by having your guests completely ignore the dog (don't look, touch, or talk, and, in fact, have them behave aloof, as though the dog weren't there), and asking them to just turn away should the dog still try to paw them (don't use hands in any way, including pulling them away, as this just initiates play). Get your guests to give nice attention to the dog as soon as he or she calms down and have them stand up and turn away as soon as the dog tries tries to lift his or her paws off the ground. It works like magic. Try it.

Conclusion

I'll share with you the very best advice I have ever heard, not just for fixing problem behaviour in dogs, but for achieving greater success and happiness in life too: Whenever something keeps happening that you don't like, tell yourself "That's my fault" and ask yourself "What have I been doing to reward that behaviour?" More than likely, you have been unwittingly encouraging your dog to behave that way. Think hard about that. Be honest. Identify where you went wrong, adjust your actions accordingly, using attention and corrections or ignoring at the appropriate times, and watch how the problem disappears.

Now go and give some nice, calm, loving attention to your dog—but only if he or she is being good, calm, or quiet. And ignore or briefly correct excited, demanding, or other unwanted behaviour. And let me know how it goes; I look forward to hearing about the amazing changes you bring about in your own dog. You will be amazed.


Seán

(Remember, I will be demonstrating all these techniques in a series of videos to accompany these lessons, so look out for those later.)

Nurturing a Better Dog, Trick No. 1: Walking!

Walk It Off

For most people with dog problems, the answer is simple: more exercise. "That's it?" you ask. "Very often," I reply. One of the biggest mistakes people make with dogs is that they believe a dog needs a big home with a large yard to run around in. I often hear this as an excuse as to why someone can't adopt a dog from me: "I only live in a small apartment; it wouldn't be fair to the dog." But the happiest dogs aren't the ones with the stress of having to 'protect' a large 'den'; nor are they the ones who get confined to the yard almost every day because their person thinks he's lucky to have such a big space to run around in.

No, the happiest, most balanced dogs are those with a small space to call their own, and at least forty-five minutes of walking every day. Yes, forty-five minutes. That can be broken up into several shorter walks (as it should if your dog can only take bathroom breaks outside, as they need at least three a day, and more if younger than eight months). But it is far better to make one of the walks a long one—better for the dog, and better for you too, as your dog will be able to release so much mental and physical energy in an acceptable manner. In fact, none of the following lessons will be able to help you if you're not providing your dog with enough daily exercise.

Unmet Needs

Dogs have a natural urge to explore just beyond their territory, to smell who may have passed by recently, to enjoy that forward momentum, to satisfy that desire to know what is 'out there', and to cement that bond he wants to have with you as only an on-leash walk can do. The more cooped-up a dog is kept, the more pent-up he will become, and with all that excess energy not being burned off in a healthy way, it will start to be released in ways that you would rather not experience: destructive behaviour, barking, nervousness, or even aggression. It's no coincidence that, of my own pack, the only dogs who bark when they hear noises outside are the crippled ones, who just don't get as many energy-releasing, stimulating, satisfying walks as my other dogs. In my neighbourhood, the dogs that bark incessantly or snap and snarl at passers-by are the ones who have the 'luxury' of a yard but don't get to go on walks.

Imagine if you weren't allowed to wander beyond your four walls, or even beyond your garden or yard. Imagine how stressed and frustrated you would start to feel if you never got to experience life outside your home. You would sink into some form of undesirable behaviour, either looking for ways to release that energy or get that stimulation, or shutting down and heading towards depression. Your dog is no different. He or she needs a good walk every day with his pack leader by his side to feel fulfilled and happy. Other forms of exercise, such as playing ball or tugging rope, all help your dog to release energy, but none compare in effectiveness to a long, tiring, controlled walk.

A dog who usually shows anxiety or barks when left alone will benefit from a long, tiring walk beforehand. A dog who tends to be overly boisterous or even aggressive will calm down much more if that energy is exhausted. A tired dog is a good dog. Even a nervous dog will calm right down after a long walk. And all these behaviours improve greatly over time the more walks the dog gets.

Controlling the Issues

But the walk must be, for the most part, on leash. This is because, if you want to control your dog's bad behaviour, you must first control your dog (and, above that, control yourself, including your thoughts on the matter, your body language, and your mood). Also, if you walk your dog the right way, it not only reinforces your status as pack leader, but defines what the pack (often just you and your dog) will pay attention to, chase, bark at, be scared of, attack, etc. A dog who is prevented from chasing other dogs because he or she is on leash will, after a while, be cured of that issue, as that behaviour will have been deterred, both through clear instruction on what is acceptable and because the addiction is weakened by a lack of regular 'fix', which is the buzz reward they get from initiating a chase. The same can be said for all manner of behaviours, even fearfulness.

Now, the usual catch 22 here is that, for many people with a problem dog, walking is a nightmare, as the dog will pull all the time or be forever trying to jump up at people, or run away from cars, or bark at passing dogs. But that will no longer be an issue, because several of the upcoming lessons will be all about getting your dog to walk nicely every single time you go for a walk--like a show-dog, right by your side, happily ignoring all distractions and visibly enjoying this new, relaxed, controlled way of walking. Don't believe it? You have to. It works. You will see.

Good For You Too

A daily walk has been proven to be the one of the keys to happiness, health, and longevity, and a great stress buster. While you may have been looking at the dog walk as a chore that you'd much rather forgo, you should now start regarding it as a blessing—a gift that your dog presents to you every single day, getting you out in fresh air, moving those legs and arms, getting air in your lungs, and leaving the pressures of the day behind. And it's free! Once he or she is walking nicely beside you, I guarantee that, no matter how much you don't look forward to that little bit of exercise, you will learn to enjoy the walk as well as feel much better after it—especially as you start to see the relationship between you and your dog greatly improving. Many people say they feel much closer and have a far more rewarding relationship with their dog when they walk him or her more.

So, glance away from your computer screen now and look at your dog. What would he or she love to do right now? And how lucky are you that this daily duty is also what is most likely to improve your dog's behaviour and your own health and happiness? So grab the leash, smile at your canine companion, and go for a longer walk than you usually do. By doing this, you'll be taking huge steps towards a much better-behaved dog. By not taking your dog on a long walk every day, you are depriving yourself of one of the easiest and most beneficial ways to improve the life you share with your four-legged friend. So get out there!

Happy walking!


Seán

(Remember: lessons on getting your dog to walk nicely are coming right up, so stay tuned!)